Self-esteem low can't help that.
Have moment when I'm up high,
then I'm brought back.
Feel that I am breaking slowly.
Inside I am taking things harder.
I take my gaze to the ceiling.
I have no idea what I'm feeling.
I'm going over me...
Another violence, my mother say nothing but silence.
See this is not me this isn't my family.
Go up high and stay.
Maybe I can keep it that way.
I hear whispers in the rain.
I'm going insane.
How much more can I take this,
before I break this.
I feel my life drain away and,
I can't even remember today.
I'm a loner, a loser in my mind.
I want to be someone else.
But I can't be anybody but myself.
When am I going to finally see?
I wait here patiently.
I'm fighting in my mind.
Fighting to not be left behind.
Living happy in my dreams are a tease.
And yet I can't help but still believe.
At night I beg for the nightmares to leave.
Try my best to open my eyes.
But do I want to wake up to face the lies?
I'm laying here vulnerable,
sleeping horrible.
In this moment I am breakable.
The nightmares come for me.
Why I even bother I wonder at times.
There's no point in it.
When all I feel like is shit.
You don't understand,
the person that I am.
I try to please everyone.
But in the end it doesn't matter.
I'm done trying to understand her.
You were right.
Look out for yourself.
Don't fight everyone else.
Do what makes you happy.
But I don't know what to do,
when lately I've been feeling crappy.
Because all I think about is you.
I'm sick of my family changing.
It's no fair he got stability.
All the rearranging. All the hostility.
They were there for him all the time.
They had excess to spare.
I say that I'll be fine, but do they even care.
That's a lie I know they do.
Maybe I'm just being selfish,
but maybe they are too.
There's no theme in this poem.
There is only you and them.
I'm writing what I'm feeling.
The feeling that I am condemned.
I can't be anymore than me.
There is only so much I can spare.
This is me and I don't really care.
Have moment when I'm up high,
then I'm brought back.
Feel that I am breaking slowly.
Inside I am taking things harder.
I take my gaze to the ceiling.
I have no idea what I'm feeling.
I'm going over me...
Another violence, my mother say nothing but silence.
See this is not me this isn't my family.
Go up high and stay.
Maybe I can keep it that way.
I hear whispers in the rain.
I'm going insane.
How much more can I take this,
before I break this.
I feel my life drain away and,
I can't even remember today.
I'm a loner, a loser in my mind.
I want to be someone else.
But I can't be anybody but myself.
When am I going to finally see?
I wait here patiently.
I'm fighting in my mind.
Fighting to not be left behind.
Living happy in my dreams are a tease.
And yet I can't help but still believe.
At night I beg for the nightmares to leave.
Try my best to open my eyes.
But do I want to wake up to face the lies?
I'm laying here vulnerable,
sleeping horrible.
In this moment I am breakable.
The nightmares come for me.
Why I even bother I wonder at times.
There's no point in it.
When all I feel like is shit.
You don't understand,
the person that I am.
I try to please everyone.
But in the end it doesn't matter.
I'm done trying to understand her.
You were right.
Look out for yourself.
Don't fight everyone else.
Do what makes you happy.
But I don't know what to do,
when lately I've been feeling crappy.
Because all I think about is you.
I'm sick of my family changing.
It's no fair he got stability.
All the rearranging. All the hostility.
They were there for him all the time.
They had excess to spare.
I say that I'll be fine, but do they even care.
That's a lie I know they do.
Maybe I'm just being selfish,
but maybe they are too.
There's no theme in this poem.
There is only you and them.
I'm writing what I'm feeling.
The feeling that I am condemned.
I can't be anymore than me.
There is only so much I can spare.
This is me and I don't really care.
This is an old poem I wrote and I think it deserves to be on here with my other poems, because It's time I don't think I'll ever forget.
